you scream, I scream, we all scream

Previously published at Kindism.org, republished with permission, and slight modifications

for ice cream…

Christian Scientists may abstain from alcohol, but they do not abstain from ice cream. Want to lure teenagers to Wednesday evening testimony meetings? Offer to take them to an ice cream social after. Want to entice your Sunday School class memorizing the Ten Commandments backwards? Offer them ice cream.

And then there are the Prin Pub Milkshakes. Prin Pub Milkshakes bring all the Prinos to the Pub. Celebrating? To the Pub for Milkshakes. Have a difficult day? To the Pub for Milkshakes. Prin Pub Milkshakes made a good day better, and a bad day less awful. There were also Milkshakes at Cox Cottage (the CS nursing facility at the Principia Campus). Are you probably suffering from food poisoning and likely have lactose intolerance? Have a milkshake! Milkshakes make everything better!

Christian Science culture teaches ice cream is an acceptable way to deal with one’s problems, and it is one that is difficult to move past. Eddy reminds us that Jesus taught we should take no thought for what we should eat or drink, but in a suffer it to be so now moment, as with marriage, man must continue to eat, so why not ice cream?

So even a decade(ish) out from CS, I still find myself drowning my sorrows in a pint, not of beer, but of haagen dazs. Difficult week of parenting? Ice cream, while hiding out away from the children who made the week difficult. Emotionally trying/complicated anniversary of the passing of a loved one? Ice cream. Political situation in the country leaving you feeling completely overwhelmed and in a pit of despair? Ice cream. Somewhat related, it is hard to sob uncontrollably while eating ice cream. Celebrating the start of summer? Ice cream (most likely shared with the children).

In or out of CS, the answer remains ice cream (and screaming).